


Good night

by Anonymous



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, Everything Hurts, Gen, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Roger Taylor (Queen) Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 15:44:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19467103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: "Good night, Freddie. We love you!"It's the evening of The Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert. It's the end of the dream they had been lucky enough to accomplish, and now there's nothing left but to fall apart.





	Good night

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!
> 
> I have a lot of feelings about this band, and this concert. More specifically the ending of it. 
> 
> This is by no means written to hurt anyones feelings or  
> to disrespect anyone. But seeing those last few minutes of that concert really hurt me deeeeeply, and this is where it got us.
> 
> Can be read as shippy, ot4, friendship, whatever your heart desires
> 
> Enjoy!  
> .  
> .  
> .

"Good night, Freddie! We love you!" 

The stadium erupted once more. People screaming their name, screaming Freddie's name. Crying, applauding. Letting out everything they had been feeling for the past months creating a loud wave of emotion. It was deafening.

Not that Roger could hear any of it. He looked over the sea of people, saw them scream and clap and wave their hands. But the only thing he could hear was the dull ringing in his ears. His vision was swimming as he felt a painful smile make it's way to his face. Every muscle in his body was screaming and begging for mercy but he smiled.

Because that's what he did. Because he wanted to show the sunshine Freddie had loved him for, even if it was only this once more. 

His trembling hands worked on autopilot as he waved one last time. Goodbye to the life he used to know. Goodbye to the dream he had been able to accomplish. Goodbye to the sunshine he had used to be. 

Goodbye to Freddie.

The light shining in the stars stretched and wavered in Roger's eyes as the turned his back to the crowd and left the stage. He felt no longing for it, it wasn't a home anymore. Because that's what the stage and performing had used to be; a home, a safe haven.

Now it felt like a graveyard of everything he had lost and he couldn't stand it anymore.

The backstage was too bright, too alive. Distantly, Roger knew that everyone was walking behind him. Chatting, celebrating the night and the man some of them thought they had known. It was a beautiful illusion, but none of them had a fucking clue who Freddie had actually been and Roger wanted to scream.

Someone tried to address him, ask him 'what now' or 'how are you' or  _ 'wouldn't it be grand to go where Freddie has gone' _ and he could only answer one of those questions with certainty. But he didn't. He just kept walking, because if he stopped he was certain he would break and he didn't know if he had anyone left to pick him back up.

So he walked until he was only followed by two people. The ones that shared his heartbreak, the ones that had gone through what he had.

The only ones that could see how close he was to falling apart.

"Roger" The first call had no effect on the blonde and Brian felt his voice crack at the second one. At least it made Roger stop. Brian came to a halt right behind him, hands hovering over the narrow shoulders ( _ when did he get so skinny? _ ) because he wanted to touch but wasn't sure if he could.

And for a second they just stood there. The three that remained, the three that had had their lives ripped to shreds and weren't exactly sure how to put them back together.

"I can't… He's gone" It was said so quietly that Brian and John barely heard it, but whatever part they missed of the sentence was filled in by the telltale tremors that started to shake Roger's shoulders, quickly spreading to his whole body.

"Roger-" 

"He's fucking gone and I'll never see him again!" The shout echoed from the walls, surely heard by other people on the backstage as well. But when it was followed by a wave of heart wrenching sobs, Brian and John knee that a few bystanders hearing was the last of their worries.

Because Roger was falling apart and they couldn't help him. They watched as the blonde fell to his knees with a wounded sound, body completely devoid of any fight until his hands came forward to stop him from falling all the way down, and something told the others it was only a reflex rather than actual will to protect himself. 

Roger's head hung low between his shoulders, and the sounds ripping from his lips were as if he was in actual, physical pain. As if someone had reached out and ripped his heart out and all he could do was scream in misery. 

Knowing he'd never get it back.

Brian and John were quick to reach down and hold him, all ready and willing to whisper sweet nothings to his ears. The blonde's hoarse wails started to crack and break, making way to a new wave of sobs that shook all three of them with their force.

"You're going to be okay. It's okay" Brian could feel bitter tears soaking through his shirt as he pulled Roger against his shoulders, calloused hands finding the fabric of the guitarists shirt and squeezing, holding on like a drowning man.

"N-no"

"Roger, liste-"

"No! It's not fair! He's supposed to be here! With me!" There was no telling him otherwise, Brian and John realised through their own tears. They could only hang on to their shattered friend and hope that the heartbreak would pass.

"He left me and I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do!"

"We're here. You're still here, Roger. It's going to be okay"

"It's not fair" While the screaming and crying had died down a bit, Roger sounded more broken than he ever had before.

"We know. It's not, but everything will be okay"

"But you don't know, Brian! You don't" And as the drummer looked at the older man, Brian could see the stars in his blue eyes. So far away, so cold, so lonely. Out of his reach.

"He's gone, and I didn't get to say goodbye! He's gone, and he left thinking that I didn't care and I'll never get to tell him otherwise!" 

Perhaps there could have been more words of comfort. Because of course Freddie had known they loved him. Of course he'd always stay with them. 

But hammering those truths through was a fight to be fought some other day. Tonight they could only hold in to each other, and silently hope they'd all see the sun the next morning.

Roger wasn't sure he could. Because he didn't see the need for sunlight anymore, not now when the person who had appreciated it the most was gone. 


End file.
